Are u a theist?an atheist?or agnostic? wateva,just go through this...

Being obsessed with something or the other in this rainy week makes me feel sick.This "rain sickness" makes me pretty much lazier and i find my bed a cozier than any thing in the rest of the world..I have been trying some interesting new hobbies during last week.Day dreaming! thinking of anything in this world by simply sitting on my bed near the window while its raining  outside makes me feel that I'm on cloud nine.:D.And this offers you an unlimited range.with out any boundaries,you can let your mind,soul or whatever to wander here and there.just enjoy to the fullest.you can dream about any trifles to  superficial things.believe me,it's not an inception effect.simply, your mind can wander here and there as the soul wanders after death.(even though I don't believe in this after death concept.

Do soul exist?

when you find the B tech life is utter boring with a lots of toughest papers especially EC papers(it doesn't seems easy even if u pronounce it as  "easy") with some funny abbreviations put by ourselves.I wish if we had some interesting papers like meta-physics to study.so that,we can make our own views and incorporate our own theories,concepts and !deas in that paper.(and make it a "highly inflammable" one.:P).
I always liked subjects such as  meta physics.Every one can add points to it.And it depends on people because each have their own perspective about GOD,eternal things,existence of soul after death and blah!
But I heard it from some horse's mouth,that is from some reliable source that we can mathematically prove that god exists and do the soul.In a lay man's point of view lemme explain it  in this way,I suppose all of you guys know what is Fourier transform,an impulse response or at least you should know what is a sine wave is.I will say sine wave is the fundamental thing present in this earth.And an impulse is something which happens at a moment.that is it has value only at the instant at which it happens and Fourier transform is a tool by which we can transform signals in the time domain to frequency domain.
It's a known fact that a signal which have infinite existence in time domain will have only a momentarily exist in the frequency domain.And vice versa.so if we consider a man or consider the living beings in the earth.If we apply a transformation like similar to Fourier transform,if it had infinite existence,after transformation we 'll get it as,it only exists as a  single frequency.that is the fundamental frequency.And hence the sine wave.so,we can say the soul do exist in the space even after our death  as a sine wave.:).It's just a mathematical proof.according to your perspective on this,you can believe this or not.
Neways, I don't believe that  soul exists after death like some ghost or a rebirth or existence of god in different forms.According to me there is only a single power,the ultimate one.It can be anything,sun,moon or the mother earth.i do believe in some power for some reasons...
But what really happens is ,
the mankind just exploits it to the core.he made an umpteen god and goddesses.witches,wizards and ghosts and..and.. the most powerful tool to destroy the mankind-RELIGION.

My first poem

The mind was brewing,
with a plethora of piled-up things.
Which made me a querist of myself.
I waited for the limelight...
but the soul showed blissful ignorance.


insane by the querulous response,
At the top of my voice,
I screamed Abaddon! and hosannas!
duh! it faded out.


The space was left void.
The time made me an alien.
And, I was lost in the
musings of my shredded life.


Hooked to the labyrinth of life,
I felt a lump in the throat.
I pursued for a redeem;
and then a redemption.


By the time, I was-
In the twilight of my life!

Twilight

she brought her two hands together,entwined them and,dipped it slowly into he pool.In  the pale white light, she saw her face in that pool.Beside that, there she saw the whitish thing.her cheeks went red,her lips widened .she smiled.now one could see her clearly - ordered teeth,glittering . The light from that whitish thing covered her pink face.she looked gorgeous in it. Her eyes sparkled like two gems. But it was drifting away slowly.she tried her best to hold it in her hands. But it was in motion. After sometime,she  successfully caught it in her hands. Her smile widened. She felt like she was flying like a cloud. Suddenly she felt someone's touch over her shoulderr. She turned back. Her eyes  didn't lie. It revealed that her mind messed up with ambiguity and distress.it was her friend.paying no attention to him,she looked for the thing. It was moving  askew. She stretched her hands and tried hard to catch it. At last,she won!it brought her to triumph.  Euphorically, she pursued to bring it closer and closer...but her hands were not that much tightly clamped to hold the fluid.it went draining...and the image disappeared completely within minutes. Tears rolled down from her sparkling eyes. She felt the insanity caused by that thing. someone was  drying her tears by the time. It was none other than him..her head rested on his shoulders. She closed her eyes and tried to console herself  that it was a dream.:)

wot makes her so reckless???

time is passing by…and i’m still starring at this page thinking what all things should i blog about coz i can’t throw all kinda crap here .i haven’t been in the best of my moods since last week. utter less!the problems are getting dumped like a heap and i’m trying hard to solve one by one with the help of my osume buddies.even when we revive back to our life with lotta positive energy,some persons can get u a  link  towards  some retrospective moments and not oly  me ,but also  every person who is experiencing a same plight as that  of mine willn’t be wishing for certain unsound things to get happen.time will heal the wounds and mistakes.but it also have the power for a back shot.and…the lady is now in such a plight.she is helpless,but she isn’t alone.she has her best buddies with her.we all can hope for her resplendent revival.the lady realizes that there is no good and evil people in this world.there are only people who understands us and not.and all u can do is to love all.:).though its late to realize the fact.she accepts this.she doesn’t have any frustration with those people who prompted her to do mistakes. only the fear,the guilty-consciousness that keeps her away.she won’t bother em again but they also have to do the same.she don’t want her best buddy to lose…it hurts..it hurts…trust me!she can’t go ahead without u.you ,the best buddy have to understand this.you din do anything wrong.all that did was her.and she accepts this and trying not to get tangle with em again.my lord,at the moment she is a hopeless creature.pardon for the reason she is trying to rectify the mistakes she did with out knowingly.i recommend her to believe in some power..the ultimate one,so that she can clear her paths with out hamper.once u lose belief in some power.you are completely free.the probability to do mistakes increases.
                                                            The lady is going through such a hard time but as always,her best buddy is always with her.she din reveal the past to him.she din give him a clue at least.coz she  was afraid.but there he console her that even if she did mistakes,he wont leave her alone. she then  realizes the complete meaning of best buddy.his words gave her the complete shade to rest on.the words were rushing right from his heart.she was worried about he being desp!:(.hmm...there both of u should have some fence between em.and she is putting a boundary there...dear,all that she can put as a break line is death and death only.she can tackle down each and every problem if and only if  u,her best buddy are there.if there is a life after death.i want you there also,as my best friend.the meaning is clear now.thanx to a certain pep talker,my friend who tries hard to counter balance my negative energy.and thanx again to u my best old buddy.:).
just a few days left for my university exams.and i have just started the preparations.tc ciao

another university result is out!

new world:

caution! this may not be an osume one.a 5mnts post to open up things which had piled up in my head!to get a relief from all the hell and mess.:P

feeling quite special to write a new post in my new blog..yes!i have changed the platform,considering blogging as something serious..:)(chumma).here is the link of my new blog:)http://sruthi5jc.wordpress.com/ spent the whole day in this crape...importing my older posts from blogger,editing my profile and so on...And,my condition is somewhat terrific for the reason that hopefully, my s3 results 'll be out in a day .so,here I don't have any specific topic to spit...but yes,i have a Lotta to open up...its all messed up...lemme arrange those things in a neat way.:)

buddies

I'm supposed to have my study leave..as u ppl know,for a student,study leaves aint meant for studying..its just for "enjaayment".yupe! the weekend was fantastically osume...weekends were always osume since feb.:P.hats off to u,my best dude,darsha,jk,rahul,navin...for giving me some osume weekends.
the later para was written by me some days back.and it was safe in my word press draft box for a week or so.and now,i'm back with this in the same platform.:).last week was a full of depressions which haunt me every now and then.@ this tym,it was coz of  ma s3 university results.
i  experienced the real failure of a B.TECH student.it was a failure which i never ever expected to be happen.still aint able to believe this s****.neways,its time to leave it at that and study hard for my s4 univ.

 old is gold:

:P

"Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is before you can meet again. And meeting again after a moment or a lifetime is certain for those who are friends."

as the time heals the wound,as it strengthen the bonds ,as it gives u new meaning for friendship,it also made the above quoted lines to be happen.my long lost friend,my first crush..and he is back with lots of care ,love and friendship to make me happy.:).i had a handful of things in my mind to be written on my first post in my new blog.but something is pulling me away...so,i'm stopping my bragging for time being.ciao

chum chum.

i hear the ticking of the clock and nothing else at this late night.huh! wait! not the ticking alone,there is my heart beating lub-dub..its an abnormal beating i think.why can't i find some synchronised musical elements in it? eh?its not the matter of scrub.but something really happened these days...something was scrubbing my head,mind,and everything.is it possible for just a phone call to make our mind get distracted.yes,it can..if they are persons important to u.it puts u and ur mind in a melancholy.it makes u look like haggard and woebegone!sh***.i don't have much reason for my run down.but the desp..the depression u call,can affect anyone.so beware!

i was getting ready to start with probability.by then, i felt like blogging.why did i keep on searching for my  notepad? my fountain pen? for spitting those craps in my blog?i would rather fancy it in a way like this..may be in some more time ,it would have been over flown with certain peculiar emotions.why is this friendship so dear to us?why we cry for it when we are dashed by someone? why do we weep silently in our heart sitting in a corner of our wonderful room,thinking of the beautiful memories he/she left with us.why we recall those unforgettable chit chats with out omitting a single word and how come we regain the guts to say "hey dude,that chick is mine?".i  thought of my friends..my school and the 12 years which     i'm like a bouncing ball..thinking of it again and                            

                                                                                                                       again that..when'll i reach at the peak point from        

                                                                                                                            bouncing back and fallin into the great ditches.

i had spend there..persons who influenced me in my path..the obstacles..potions that helped me towards success,that succored me to swallow the blurred images and the rest of the craps..what was the link towards those lamed pictures that got framed in my mind?i wanna spit it right here..@ the moment..for my sake.:).

but  before that,i have to thank the  ultimate power for giving some osume friends when i'm out in some hell and mess.yes!! thanking you my lord..i dedicate this to all friends especially nitin,darsha,vishak,krate,malu,mathews,and vicky.:).

here is the entire roll...

darsha- refered  as my best friend.17 yrs we spend together,we slept together,ate together,late night studies we had(actually we were gossiping),we were in the same class,we sat in the same bench and took the very next seat except when u went to vaithi's sanskrit class and i was left with other mallu students.even in troubles too we were one!!! we know how much we hated those history classes..how hard we studied the geography lessons plunging our legs into cold water for hours and hours...how much studious we were for jayalekshmi teacher's bio class..and how we hated those fucking maths hws,:P.from 7th onwards aathira and lechu were also there in our bench.na?i still miss our ground(not the school ground).we played together with 4 or 5 other kids too.we had our own gang,prakash,ambi,sowmya,vishwesh,vishak.we played red letter,syrup,dinner,kallan and police,cricket,marathil thotal pidichuda,sat,cards..more and more..and i can't forget our cycle race and athapookalam..:P.i dunno what i would have been if u weren't there.thanx for being my best friend. how ever we managed to patch up those small small dust ups.about 95% of my secrets are revealed to you.na?

krate:the atheist.my best pal from some of the

social networking sites.he was there with me with a hanky full of love and care to dry my tears.he was there with me when ever i felt lonely and so on..hats off to ya.

vishak,ashwathy and lekshmi priya: studied in the same school,we dint kno each other till they shuffled us and put us into E div.10th  was an osume year with lots of fun.these ppl where my best friends from 10th onwards.bt sorry achu and lp..i couldn't keep in touch.i remember those combine study hours in our home and JD's sleeping ent classes..laaif.:P.and vishak..u are the person who is responsible for this outcome...:)

anand: aka kannan.my sweet brother.elder or younger??? :P.you say.the musician,the violinist.voice o'ivano.and here goes the list.you will be my brother for the rest of my life too dear.u along with nitish made me ROFL!!!.that grape juice..:P.many more stories are there in my head..i still cherish my 10th remembering u both.:).our school day and all..it was osume!!!

vidya: my cousin .nakinu oru licence-um illa.:P

 nitin: i just know him since one or two months.but we both managed to meet every weekends except some saturdays and sundays.you are also there in my best friend's list bro.:). loyolite,the draw well,who enjoys partying with friends..hangout freak..if i go on with this there are about hundred labels for him.a perfect human who has experienced both the bitterness and sweetness of the love life.:) who is ready to help his friends any time."allelum avashyam varumbo evanoke kanu".:P

jayakrishnan::P my first crush..can i name this as a crush???

sreekanth,finny,arun:my close friends i will say.sreekanth-the cs freak,the mast**** of robotics,the singer.finny-the studious,who has certain panomial reasons for each and every thing..each time when i seek his advice,i take it to my heart and say "ok..sure..i'll trty my level best to keep away from the lap".but its of no use...:).sorry dear.::(
mathews:again comes another loyolite..my best buddy..my fighting friend..:)


prolok: yes,iitian,my good friend..
prathik:the person who is responsible for the creation of this blog directly or indirectly.the atheist.the stephanian.

ajai,sujith,abish,sarath,abish,sankaran,shifas,vishak,binup,deepu,anoop chetn: chetnmar of sct!!! 

deepal,anan,sanku,suraj,kichu,asif chetan,nikhil,rahul..: cetians!!! most o'em are from royal  Mex.:P

nidhin,sarath,aneesh,vishwajith,nandu,ajay mohan,fazil,jothish,ashok,pappan,karthick,shameer,jithin,and the entire A div.......actually i'm asking u dudes,are you my friends or are we enemies?:P.they made me laugh quite a num of tyms and made me close to tears also.bt still i like em.school life was great..:)

amritha,saranya,prabha,remya,venkatalekshmi,greeshma,rugma,revathy,chethana,sruthy,vidya,varsha,parvathy,lekshmi,sneha,maya,gopi krishna,arunya,nisha,dhanya,ananya,veena: i do remember u girls..we had a lotta fun together and some ego clashes and our group song..i can't forget.:P

vibhu,ajay,harish kamal,sachin,aswin vijay,arif,mandan vishak,chandu,arun.s.k,deepu krishna,karthick,anand,...i recall mathew sir's class..ajai,chandu,vishnu,hari..where always the late comers.office time!!!missing u so much.still i'm waiting for aug 15th to have a get together! :P

TBC...

juxtaposition-part II

right back @ ya,after a looong gap.:P. Hmm... needed a Lotta time to fill in all the craps and i spend too much time for  equalizing those personal stuffs by  counterpoising something which i thought as a positive.And at last it left me in a semi stable condition which requires some more symmetry for a perfect matching.this month came up with some nice friends,meetings,hangout,some twists, some fucking series exams..there results,some dust up,inter collegiate fest and bla bla bla.and an important event.."my 19th b'day".
                                                          i never ever categorized my friends into such and such groups like chat friends,orkut  friends and all.i regarded all o'em as my good friends.but it hurts when u realize that they din't do the same. duh!..hows it possible for u people?you might have some convincing answers with you.but i'm still obscure about it.:(.may be my pride and prejudice that's not allowing my mind to accept the fact.

how is my sauce writing skills?









at 11am we 5 were  chit chatting around some table at ambrosia.we were on the trot for ordering the eatable things...chicken wings,fruit cups,pizza,burger,coke,milk shake,red bull,sandwich and more and more items..one thing which i still  hate about amb is the time we have to spend after ordering those kinda fried stuffs..but,this time we managed to utilize it by sauce  writing.:P.and had to stop it suddenly when we saw the bearer rolling his two bull's eyes over me.:(.laaf.but,it was an osume treat:).we just enjoyed it.we had fun around 3pm.
and by then,it was  time for us to leave.we scrolled outta amb and went to the parking area to see gb's car.and some interesting funny  things happened there...(i'm not revealing it now) till now i was explaining this to every one a handful o'times.ah...my fate!! i believe all the things  that  happens around me..its my fault..i know that.. no more chance of making me a laughing stock.but this one was really !@#%^&p;;.:P.:D

 it was a cool Feb morning.after some chota chota wrangling, we 4 met up in amb.the party was just OK and not an osume thing for me coz of the reason that we haven't prepared for a nice treat after the dust up.
 after that we directed to our college.the programs were so nicely boring. but our game stall was scoring a decent amount o'money from poor guys.err..those money goes directly to the magazine fund and not into our pocket.duh!
 wtf!!! a girl and a boy can't be best friends???they don't have the right to take the near seats and have a nice talk? i'm not getting u people.screw the college.!!screw the society,screw the people.i busted out with anger and frustration and was close to tears,when some college mates were prying into my personal matters.i do have the heart for telling anyone the fact that i'm committed, if i am in a relationship.i don't find any indecency in falling in love with someone.but..what the heck i should say if i'm not??out in the hell and mess,i thought of throwing s*** on em.ah..my mind was totally disturbed..even now also,i haven't able to bring it back to the normal plight.go people..go gossiping.what is the need of convincing u jackasses? withal the feminine love, i feel shame on you snoopy girls for creating such stupid pejorative scenes!!!

THE KITE RUNNER

"when you kill a man,you steal a life.you steal his wife's right to a husband,rob his children of a father,when you tell a lie,you steal someone's right to the truth.when you cheat,you steal the right to fairness.there is no act more than stealing.a man who takes what's not to take,be it a life.i spit on such a man.and if i ever cross paths with him,god help him."

i was flipping the pages o'"the kite runners" in a hurry to find those sentences which pulled me aside to read this book. someday before,it gave a big bang on ma head, when i was accessing some social networking sites.it was posted by GB,one o'my friend in the FB wall.at that moment,i dint even know it was from a book.i googled the quote to find out what it was.and the result i got was "the kite runner" by  khaled hosseini.i can't explain u people,what  is more in that.but its just amazing.a quote which depicts the truism of one's life.i searched the book in the entire library..but i couldn't find it.i was in an agog to read that book.i thought of buying that book.but thanx to the superpower which i believe.it was with ma friend vikky.at the day i got the book,i skipped the pages again and again. from the front, back and from the middle too.laaf..u call such a situation in which u aint able to find something u want so badly..so i dropped my intension and continued with my reading thinking o'the time i wasted in searching the quote.i turned the next page o'the KR.ran my eyes over the entire page and got struck somewhere.i yelled u know? i was flushing with pleasure. at last,i got it!!! i was on the trot coz i couldn't resist showing the quote to everyone.here i should stop my bragging i think.i have a lot to blog..but  right now,i'm not in the mood to blog anymore.ciao Tc.